A Writing Drill/Roast For the Sake of Getting a Point Across

When I heard about Florida International University's hiring of Isiah Thomas as their new men's basketball coach last week, I wasn't moved to write or do anything aside from shake my head.  Not until I watched Isiah during ESPN's live interview the next day, and saw that Isiah not only fails to show any signs of change or personal improvement (or makes any attempt to fake it by using carefully scripted lines from a PR/HR agency), but he continues to make everything he does about himself and only himself.  Those who have played college sports know that typically one individual (your head coach) can very easily become the most physically, mentally and emotionally abusive person in a young person's life.  It's also a person you have to deal with almost on a daily basis during what are supposed to be the best years of your life.   Those of us who have played know how harmful this publicity stunt by FIU could potentially be to 18-22 year-olds who did not sign up to play for a man who carries serious, well-documented baggage on and off the court.   

Clearly Pete Garcia, the athletic director, who did no background check, doesn't appear to be too concerned.  He is just falling short of calling his hire a brilliant move, and not making much of the concerns being raised by female professors (and let's hope there are some male professors who are familiar with what Isiah did to Anucha Browne Sanders.)  Garcia seems to be acting as though he's now pals with the athletic popular kid, making Garcia, in his mind, the coolest AD on the playground.

Below is my plea to FIU's president.   Just to be clear and avoid any allegations of slander, it's NOT written by the president of FIU, it's written by me, a writer who covered an extensive story on Anucha Browne Sanders v. Isiah and the Garden, and a writer who's played top 25 DI ball for a coach who once made us do 45 minutes of defensive slides at the end of a 3.5 hour practice one day before we played Purdue at Purdue.  I was also thrown off the team (along with another teammate) after we beat Auburn at Auburn.  My teammate who ended up in the doghouse with me (we were both bothered by our lack of playing time--long story) and I were told to room together and gather all our gear, which was to be turned in to the athletic department the next day when we got back to Evanston.  Fearing that I'd be sent home with nothing but suicidal shame, I went to see my coach in his hotel room at 1 a.m.  After keeping my cool and apologizing, he put me back on the team.  I encouraged my teammate to do the same.  She did so, and she too was put back on the team.  I remember both of us looking in the mirror that night unable to believe how swollen our faces had become from crying so hard.

Thanks to Peter Vecsey of the NY Post for including an earlier draft of this roast in his weekly email to NBA staff, fans and media.  And another thanks to a writer friend who wrote in an email, "I think Isiah will frame your letter."

Dear Coach Thomas, 

As President of Florida International University for the past 13 years, I just wanted to let you know how excited we are to have a former World Champion and Bad Boy now leading our Golden Panthers.  You are still, hands down, the greatest point guard in the history of the game, and I’ll be sure to say this every time I introduce you at any and every event. We'll have to show those young kids those highlight tapes because, much to our disappointment, not one of the top 100 high school recruits in a random sampling on scout.com were named after you (per your claim on your live ESPN interview that you’d be walking into homes where parents named their kids after you.)  But I’m absolutely sure we can look around Miami and find at least one Isiah who will claim your namesake and give us a great story for The Beacon.  

Still, in spite of your lack of experience in building relationships and encouraging personal growth with co-eds between the ages of 15-22, I just want to let you know that I have supreme confidence in you.  Why?  Because I know you did give it your very best as a coach and executive in the N.B.A., and while many people want to bring attention to your losing seasons, your comments on how you “fight ‘til death,” and how you lost all respect of the entire team and staff yet refused to resign, those types of efforts in the face of a booing arena do not go unnoticed.  (And by the way, I know that the jury was totally wrong--$11.5 million for what, a little name calling, all in good fun?)  

I’ve disregarded those claims that staff in the C.B.A. made about how you completely abandoned your public personality behind closed doors and morphed into one of the rudest and crudest individuals they’ve ever seen. I’ve decided to stand behind our athletic director Pete Garcia when he said you are a good friend, successful father and well, just a “great human being.”  How many college coaches out there can speak to how complicated life becomes when you have an estranged love child, lose a precedent-setting sex harassment suit, and later attempt suicide and use your daughter to cover it up? 

I absolutely believe that your charm and unique passion for the game are all we need to turn us into a powerhouse that will greatly increase our current average attendance of 693 fans per game.  All of our fans should personally thank you for donating your salary back to the school.  (Though I do think we have your lawyers and James Dolan to thank for your financial security.  I will have a Panther sweatshirt sent up to the Big Apple first thing tomorrow a.m.).

I also wanted to take this opportunity early in our five-year relationship to make two suggestions.  (I’m sure a person who has been as through as much personal and professional hardship as you have would be very open to professional advice, constructive criticism and a few words on accountability.) 

So here we go:  First, it might be a good idea to toss the word “education” or “student-athlete” into interviews from time-to-time, especially when you are speaking to a mass audience filled with those critics you are certainly going to prove wrong.  At the very least, go with the norm, and make it appear that our student-athletes (see how I used it there) will have to carry an occasional book, go to classrooms and even check out the girls in the library from time to time.  In short, they must meet at least a minimal standard when they’re not tanning or sleeping on South Beach. 

South Beach—now there is a great sell, a perfect place to recover from all the sweat spent on the court preparing for “the next level,” as you’ve mentioned in every interview, numerous times.  While I know you’ve been there and done that, this brings me to my second suggestion:  sell a near impossible dream to parents and teenagers in living rooms all night and day, but please—well, only if you think it’s a good idea, of course—consider limiting your comments to the media about “taking players to the next level.”  You may, perhaps, wish to replace them with an emphasis on how we’re going to “win games” and “make it to the Big Dance,” because dancing is fun and a nice way to help us raise the funds to build an arena in your honor. 

On a serious note, while I have no doubt you can sell loads of parents and recruits on how you’re going to help get them to “The League” and how your players were the ones who shafted you when you were coaching there, all this talk of the next level may lead some to ask how many FIU players have been drafted by the N.B.A.:  the answer is one.  Clyde Corely.  1983. 

(A sidebar regarding numbers:  I’ll have someone look into the graduation rate of our basketball players ASAP, and possibly do what Anucha Browne Sanders did by giving you a listing of important facts top staff should know about our institution of higher learning, but I’ll be sure to send a male figure so that you aren’t tempted to call him a b----, h- or mother-----, though I don’t believe you did any of this, not for one second.) 

It also seems to me that it may be a good idea for you to do what you can whenever possible to send a more respectful message to our lesser known 38,000 FIU students, most of whom are footing their own student loans and working at least one, if not two jobs.  Please go out of your way to admire their lofty goal of finding a profession where they are expected to carry themselves with integrity, do their time, and learn the value of preparation.  I think it’s terrific that you realize how many people aren’t as privileged and well-dressed as you are—these poor kids are going to have to venture into harsh working environments, and, without any championship rings on their fingers, they’re going to have to determine their own professional fate based on two factors:  results and merit.

I just want you to know how much we believe in you, despite the fact that you have incensed almost every honest, diligent soul in existence, and every college coach or recruiter, both dead and alive, those in particular who, as you said on ESPN, have been “beating the bushes” on the brutal recruiting trail for years, and specifically the hopeless purists who still believe in the beauty and value of college athletics.

I want to end with my complete and total vote of confidence:  I’m absolutely sure you, Zeke, are going to overcome the deadly sin that is often attributed to complete self-destruction:  envy.  It’s a force most coaches (not you) will never admit let alone rein, especially for the former greats who are given control of those young and lucky enough to still race, bully, score, and dominate the hardwood, the way you did many years ago (moments I am happy to recount as often as you need).  If our players don’t appreciate your accomplishments and leadership, if they fail to get it done and those seats remain empty, I suppose we are no worse off than we were before you arrived.  Yet I do firmly believe that someone of your high standing would never ever leave our fans with the impression that Division I college basketball could possibly drop a level.  Not on your watch.

Go Panthers! 

 

Truly yours,

Modesto A. Maidique

President

Florida International University

Chicago Screening: The Flick the Bird Lesson

Flashpoint Academy screened $ GAME to a class of film, video and digital students on Monday afternoon, followed by an evening screening for a group of old friends and former athletes from my alma mater, Northwestern University. Here's a shot of me with FP owner & founder Howard Tullman, my longtime pal. Howard gave us a tour of his state-of-the-art school, its hallways filled with his incredible art collection. 

Here's a photo of Howard (and me) in a forest with former Northwestern athletes.

Here's me handling Q & A during the evening session. (On Friday I see the doctor and if he says I'm done with rehab, I will no longer have a perfect excuse for wearing sneakers and jeans.)


These two screenings taught me the Flick the Bird Lesson. The younger crowd -- the students, mostly male 18 to 22 -- laughed loudly at the point in the film when the girl flips off Ruby (for no apparent reason). The Northwestern crowd did not laugh. (A few of my friends admitted they didn't get the bird scene either--nor did I, but as a writer-producer-actress who wants to respect a director's space, you must pick and limit your questions carefully.) 

The take-away from me was a reminder of what I knew but didn't appreciate until producing something for the screen: what I think is funny may not be funny according to others; what others think is funny sometimes doesn't make me laugh. (My 7th grade students often roared at Austin Powers scenes and jokes; I sat there laughing at my students, not at the screen.) I've heard this lesson from stand-up comedians who say they must adjust their game based on who's in the house. The problem with movie-making is that you want to fill the house and make everyone laugh from sixth graders to seniors without having to change a thing. 

Overall both crowds enjoyed the short with the understanding that it's a selling tool for the full feature. But truth be told, the kids laughed more.  I text-messaged Tom this assessment and he Tom says we'll take laughter from kids any and every day of the week.

Some more photos...this one of former Northwestern athletes and staff.

And saving the best for last, here is a shot of me with my two college roommates, Steph and Lauryn. I enjoyed staying with them and spending time with their families.

Some of the Pop on $ GAME

The emails, text messages and phone calls flooded MOHOSTUDIO.COM after the screening. Before I list the sampling, here's a shot of the boy who stole the show, Marquis Rodriguez, who played the role of Ruby. After the screening, I turned around to my family and my dad and uncle didn't say, "Congrats! You were terrific! Loved seeing you up there!" They said, "Who's the kid? He was awesome!" My tap dance teacher was kind enough to let me use her studio for a last-minute casting call two days before we started shooting. And that's where I found Marquis.

“I just wanted to say again how much I admired your accomplishment in realizing "$ Game" to the big screen. There is a ton of energy and good humor packed into it, as evidenced by the crowd reaction the other night, and also a lot of well-earned sentiment. I love the trumpet player parts and thought they carried a lot of that spirit from the longer screenplay into the short. There was a brief moment of eye-contact between you and Reo toward the end that I thought had the kind of chemistry that many films spend two hours trying to establish and often fail.” -- Tim B.

“You were $! Clever, exciting, well-acted, and those hoops scenes were strongly edited. You willed this to happen by the sheer force of you. Your mother would have been very very proud of you.” – Jack R.

“Mo, I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed your film the other night. It was awesome. And I know you put a ton of work in over the last 5 years. I was so touched by the stories and tribute to your mother.” Jen S.



“Just awesome.” -- Dave L.

"Hey, Mo, Just wanted to congratulate you on an AMAZING job with $ Game! Glad all that hard work finally paid off! Hope I get to see a full-length movie soon! I’m rooting for you!” -- Deb B.

“Just wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed the screening on Monday night. I think you and Tom did a great job. From my little experience with writing, I know that it is not easy to put pen to paper and create characters, plot, etc. And then to put it on film is another difficult challenge. You should be very proud of what you put together. Congratulations, and continued success.” – Simon L.

“Dear Maureen, Thank you so much for inviting me to be a part of your world the other night - you have every reason to be proud and joyous. That is wonderful piece of film and I wish you luck with Sundance.” – Tom T.

“The boys had a great time. Hopefully it gave them a good idea of what it means to have passion for something.” – Carol G.

“LOVED IT! Look at you, crazy talented ballplayer. I’m not ever playing against you, that’s for sure.” – Gil M.

“Great job getting to the finish line. You have a terrific supporting cast and a group that had a goal to get it done. Congratulations and keep at it!” -- Rob M.

“Lots of fun, particularly for hoops junkies.” -- Tom M.

“Supercongrats! It was really cool and fun.” -- Nunyo

“Great job, Maureen. You did it and you looked beautiful on the big screen. I can only imagine how much work it took to put it together - good luck with the next phase.” – Dave P.

“Great job, Mo. My mother and I had a great time last night. Thanks for inviting me.” – Ricky “7-footer” Lopes

“I just want to let you know how much we enjoyed being there last night. The film was fantastic. So well done. So fun and funny and inspirational. And, Tom was a fantastic emcee. There was such a great feeling in the room, with all the players there. And Marquis (sp?) who was sitting right in back of us, was so incredibly cute.” – Linda B.

“Mo, CONGRATS!!! The film was great – from the acting, to the sound, to the editing, all of it! I also thought your acting was great. I know that this was your baby, and you put so much into it, and I’m happy for you that it finally hit the screen! Enjoy it!” --Ted S.

“On behalf of my wife and myself we'd like to thank you for having us at the premiere last night. It was truly a great film and I fully expect big things from it.” -- Elix B.

“Hey, Mo. Wow that really was terrific. I thought the short was really realistic—a great message! I was so impressed with the participation and the cooperation to make it.” – Jamie M.

$ Game Screening News & Photos

Well, here he is folks. Tom Cavanagh basked in the applause as he led us to the all-city title last night, bringing the house down with his artistic brilliance. The theatre was packed with 350 people--adults, teens, kids, men, women. When we gave people a chance to leave after the film -- to get home and put kids to bed -- not one person moved and someone called out, "Play it again!"

Here's the packed house:
Thanks to Ryan and Kevin Holohan, who drove three hours to stand in as bouncers for the screening (I asked them to put on weight and look big for this role). Immediately after the show, they had to return upstate and report to work. And my brother Kevin came, despite the fact that he has three little ones -- the 1.5 year old broke her leg on Saturday coming down a slide -- his wife insisted he go to NYC to see the blockbuster short of the decade.

Such troopers!

Big Ricky Lopes, who played the role of Thug #1 but could not be a nicer gentlemen.










Here's Ben "Boo" Greene, who played our third teammate in the Harlem Hustle scenes.

















Line producer Holly Hurley with trumpet coach Joey V.


Keith "Truck" Hudson, our musical supervisor and sideline player strikes a pose.


Me with my hair straightened and sporting the pretty necklace my Aunt Carol let me borrow. I prefer wild curls, but my sister told me I had to look a little more collected for the evening.







Speaking of my sister, her she is, as she put it, "Keeping the reigns on Dad." (Dad is a proud Irish gentleman who can tell stories upon stories, adding much fiction to fact to the point where we have to call a time out.)



Now for the total stud who played the supporting role of Reo, Mr. Chris Collins...

Here's the very pretty and friendly Maureen Cavanagh in the mix...

DeeMorris and Tom.

Dan and Luke ... pickup player, thug & emcee, both stand-up comedians.


Tom with his buddy Rasheed.


Me talking to Rob Burnett, one of the best moments of the last eight years of my life.
Mary Ciuk, my college assistant coach and I laughing along with my brother Ryan.

And before we move to the after party, we must get those team photos. Here are a few that show how difficult it is to get the siblings together and to stand still, show affection and in unison, smile at the camera. Here we are looking for Dad to join us ... he's yakking someone's ear off ...


Here we are. I am one of the smallest Holohans, and I am no lightweight. Ryan and Kevin are going to have a weigh-in at Thanksgiving this year, and we're going to bet on who's got more padding, but not playing any football.

And here we are, after convincing Ryan to stop talking so we can focus and get this over with. Dad, as expected, is in a conversation with someone else.

And here is some of the crew from Wynantskill, N.Y.: Neighbors, high school friends, my post-college roommate, Mama P along with Tom C.

$ GAME After-Party Photos!

Producer and superb comedic actor Victor Hawks and Ginger.


Tom Cav and our super sound mixer John Bosch...


Some of the girls who road-tripped from my hometown.

My brother Ryan and Jeff Harley. Jeff grew up across the street from us and was by far, one of the most competitive kids on the block. After working at the hardware store for years, never having gone to college, he found his passion: health and fitness. He now owns 37 health and fitness centers in North and South Carolina.


And last, Chris Collins and me.

$ GAME POSTER complete!

Here's the poster--finished it just in time for screening, $ GAME website + Sundance submission! Screening is at Columbia U on Sept. 15th...over 350 people have RSVP'd!

Photoshoot in the Outerbanks

My sister Meghan saw that I'd accomplished my goal of writing 100 pages and said, "Good, just get in the car and let's drive." I strapped on my boot, packed a bag, got into the rental and we were off on the first vacation I've taken in about 1.5 years (due mostly to $ GAME cost and timing issues plus an issue I have with not giving myself time off unless I've earned it.)

I was not supposed to swim in the ocean due to my recent ankle reconstruction (thanks to $ GAME, too, another blog) and the fact that the waves, driven by undercurrents of pre-Hannah, were knocking healthy people over. My sister helped me into the water and it was fun until a wave hit me so hard that I crashed into her and ended up being wrapped around her ankles.

Activities (everyone else enjoyed, but I could not participate in) included: tennis, swimming, Marco Polo, synchronized swimming competition (I was a judge), biking, golf.

Activities (where I could play, too): kayaking with Gman, trivial pursuit and sitting on the couch, staring in shock and fear as we watched Sarah Palin become the Republican party's rock star.

Here are my photos, some of them are doctored with a paint tool.

Vote on your favorite photo:


Meghan H. over the shoulder.

Meg H. having a brew.


Patrika and Meg H.

Gman

Lavinia and her husband making a whirlpool.

Mike B and Meg H.

Another one of Mike B.

This could be my favorite. Not the best light and the camera started throwing a fit. But here is pretty Lavinia, aka Vinny, our Romanian sister.

Meg striking a Women's Health pose.

This is Trika. I dry brushed her a bit. The natural photo may be better.

Me as sexy house photographer, dressed like an albino.

Here's me in my OBX office, a screened-in porch overlooking the ocean. I spent most of my working hours planning the NYC screening of $ GAME. I also found a small gym where I could lift and a coffee shop for my daily run. Gman and I did go kayaking though. The plan after we were done was to say the heck with doctor's orders, I'm going to put on the Speedo and swim the sound!

Problem was that the sound was a gigantic five-foot mud puddle. It was best to stay in the boat.

Yes, we did eventually get in the water after going through a demo on land. I enjoyed our easy (free) ride and the lesson on the environment. Meg and Mike bailed on us second before we departed.

Here's a grainy shot of me in the Speedo, having had no luck with our swim in the sound. Meg and I went in the ocean and I enjoyed getting knocked around for a while. The ankle felt great, so I decided to push it with a walk in the ocean, no boot, no brace.

My sister took this photo of me when I was unaware of her presence, preoccupied with simply putting one foot in front of the other. I painted it in photoshop. It's the perfect shot of a washed-up athlete with a sore back and an ankle on the mend.

Looking forward to going back to OBX next year.